🚧 under
construction
4EVER 🚧
NEW!!!
Cartoon·Butt·Sleeping.COM
★ A SHRiNE ★ ☮ A SAFE SPACE 4 SLEEPY BUTTS ☮ ★ WELCOME ★
> hello and welcome to the internet.
> u have arrived at cartoonbuttsleeping.com.
> this site is abt a cartoon butt.
> it is asleep. please be quiet.█
00042069
👁 VIEWS
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★ HEY U ★ YES U ★ U LOOK GREAT TODAY ★ HAVE U BEEN WORKING OUT ★ U HAVE?? WOW ★ OK KEEP SCROLLING ★
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♡ A NOTE 4 U ♡

~ a note ~

This site is buns. im just here for the fans.

- love mom
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✿ ✿ THE SHRINE ✿ ✿

🚧 HOLY ground 🚧 shoes off plz 🚧
holy napper
~*~ the holy napper ~*~

he is asleep.
please do not wake him.
he has been thru a lot.

✞ butt up ✞ world at peace ✞
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he is staring

he is staring at u

click him. i dare u.

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★ OUR HEROES ★

~ the two patron saints of this website ~

★ KURT ★

kurt cobain
patron saint of ripped cardigans & feeling feelings 1967 — 1994 · forever

✦ STEPHAN ✦

stephan jenkins
patron saint of windows-down summer & the doot-doo-doos 1964 — still rocking
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♬♪ THE JUKEBOX ♪♬

♥ hit the GREEN PLAY BUTTON on any song!! ♥
it plays RIGHT HERE
no leaving the site
(u will have to connect spotify the 1st time prob)
♪ #1 · semi-charmed life · 3EB
♪ #2 · come as you are · nirvana
♪ #3 · jumper · 3EB
♪ #4 · heart-shaped box · nirvana
♪ #5 · the man who sold the world · BOWIE ⚡
♪ #6 · drain you · nirvana
♪ #7 · never let you go · 3EB
> note: browsers DO NOT let websites auto-blast music at u
> (thank god honestly)
> so u gotta hit play yourself. it's worth it.
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~ * LYRiCS WALL * ~

~ little scraps, sounds, and phrases that live in our heads rent free ~

doot · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo
doot · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo — u know what song this is
"the sky was the color of a bruise
& we were yelling along anyway" — us, in the car, windows down, probably
la · la · la · la la la · la
la la · la la · la la la — every chorus ever, honestly
oh-oh · oh-oh · oh-oh · oh
whoa-oh · whoa-oh · whoa — 90s alt rock core memory
"we were two weird aquarius kids
yelling at the ocean
& the ocean yelled back" — song we haven't written yet
nah · nah nah nah · nah nah nah nah
heyyyyy juuuude (wait wrong song) — we got distracted
makin my way downtown
walkin fast · faces pass
and im homebound — da da da da da da da
*clarinet noises*
*clarinet noises getting sadder*
*clarinet stops*
(silence)
*soft snore* — squidward's greatest hits
> these r our own lil' lyrics, vibes, & mouth-sounds!
> the real songs r in the jukebox above — press play!
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☎☎ HOTLINES U CAN CALL ☎☎

★ REAL NUMBERS · REAL PHONES · REAL WEIRD ★
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<< jokes.TXT >>

⚠ WARNING: jokes below ⚠

  1. Q: why do aquariuses make bad secret agents?
    A: too honest. too weird. would 100% tell u about ur aura.
  2. Q: what do u call a nap on a table?
    A: a tabnap. (like catnap but bonkier.)
  3. Q: what's the difference between a cartoon & a real butt?
    A: about 400 dollars worth of animation.
  4. Q: why was the moon tired?
    A: full week, full cycle, full shift. it does a lot.
  5. Q: what do u call an aquarius without a phone?
    A: dangerous. they will redecorate something.
  6. Q: why don't stars ever need sleep?
    A: they just twinkle through it.
  7. Q: what did the jellyfish say to the sleepy octopus?
    A: "long time no sea, bestie."
  8. Q: how do u comfort a sad guitar?
    A: u tell it it's picked.
· · · · · · · · · · · · · · ·

want more? of course u do →

(the joke will go here)
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✧ 3EB SHRINE ✧ (shrine within shrine)

👁️

~ the third eye sees all ~

some bands don't just play music.
they move into ur whole heart rent free.

doot · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo
doot · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo
  • frontman: stephan jenkins
  • from: san francisco, 1993
  • the song: semi-charmed life
  • the feeling: summer, windows down, yelling
  • jumper: good song actually
  • never let u go: also good
  • conclusion: 3EB forever & also the butt forever
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⚡ ☆ THE BOWIE SHRINE ☆ ⚡

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👁
👁

~ st. david of stardust ~

patron saint of changing every 6 months & making it look easy
⚡ glam · alien · genius · forever ⚡

★ THE VIBES ★ ground · control · to · major · butt
★彡 ☆彡 ★彡 ☆彡 ★彡
(this is bowie-flavored gibberish, not a real lyric. real lyric is in the song above ↑)
  • name: david robert jones (1947 — 2016 ✦ forever)
  • aliases: ziggy stardust, the thin white duke, aladdin sane, halloween jack, & about 7 more
  • iconic look: orange mullet · lightning bolt face · two different colored eyes (technically anisocoria from a teenage punch)
  • fun fact: the man who sold the world is actually a bowie song from 1970 — nirvana covered it on mtv unplugged in 1993 & absolutely destroyed it (in a good way)
  • aquarius?: NO he's a capricorn (jan 8) but he's vibe-aquarius which counts
  • conclusion: there's no version of u that bowie wouldn't have approved of. be weirder.
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~ really nice stuff ~

rest is not laziness. sometimes the bravest thing a squid can do is put their butt in the air and fully commit to a nap. — the shrine
be weird on purpose. weirdness is a love language. — house rule #1
u do not need to have ur life together to be deeply, spectacularly loved. — house rule #2
if it makes u and one other person laugh at the same time it is already a good day. — house rule #3
u can do hard things. u can also take a nap first. those r not opposites. — house rule #4
doot · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo. — stephan jenkins (probably)
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!!! THE BUTT WALL !!!

zzz... (artist's rendering)
🍑 🍑 🍑 🍑 🍑
butts blessed today:
0
honks honked:
0
🍑 🍑 🍑 🍑 🍑
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♡ ♡ GUESTBOOK ♡ ♡

sign below or it does not count as visiting
(these guests are real & present in spirit)

★SquidwardFan4Ever★forever ago this is the best site on the world wide web. i am crying (in a good way).
aquariusmom22last tuesday came 4 the butt stayed 4 the hotlines. would worship the sleepy squid again. 10/10
stephan_j_realat 3am doot · doo · doo · doo · doo · doo
butt_enjoyer_99yesterday called the peptoc line. cried. healed. called again.
ur mom2 min ago proud of u. go to bed.
anonymousdate unknown i dont get it but i love it
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★ ★ STUFF 2 CLICK ★ ★

~ a buffet of buttons. push them all. ~

🔮 the magic 8 butt

ask a question, click for an answer

(it awaits ur question)

⚡ ur bowie alias

click to find out who u are this week

(unleash the alter ego)

💌 compliment generator

a real nice thing, just for u

(prepare 2 be perceived)

♒ aquarius horoscope

today's vibe, prescribed

(the cosmos await)

📖 bedtime story title

u have to make up the rest urself

(once upon a time...)

🎺 PRESS 4 NOISE

just makes a sound. that's it.

(silence... 4 now)

🐟 BABY GOLDFISH POND 🐟

click the baby fish & lil chip bags before they swim away. they r fast and tiny and do not care about u.

caught: 0 escaped: 0

no real fish or chips were harmed. these r pixels.

🏆 LEADERBOARD 🏆

ur top scores this session:

no scores yet. catch some fish!!

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★ thx 4 visiting ★ tell ur friends ★ tell ur enemies ★ tell ur cat ★ the butt loves u ★ u r special ★ ok bye ★